This Post is Not Intended To Be A Factual Statement

I awoke this morning the way I usually do, leaping out of bed before the alarm even went off! #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

OK, if I'm being FACTUAL I was catching up on tweets between snoozes 2 & 3, begrudgingly becoming more coherent as the minutes ticked by. When what to my wandering eye should appear but a series of HILARIOUS tweets from the always funny, @StephenAtHome. These contained a series of facts about Arizona Congressman John Kyl, all with the hashtag #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. This was in response to a statement from Congressman Kyl's office, when confronted with the disparity between a figure he stated regarding the percentage of resources spent on abortions performed at Planned Parenthood (90%) and the actual figure (3%). Apparently, the use of this figure was not intended to be a "factual statement", and a twitter hashtag was born.

I think that anyone, no matter what your political leanings or personal beliefs may be, can get a kick out of some of these. I've listed some of my favorites below, which represent 90% of the tweets Stephen Colbert has published in the past 24 hours #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement,

The secret to Jon Kyl's success can be found on page 53 of the Necronomicon.

Every halloween Jon Kyl dresses up as a sexy Mitch Daniels.

Along a certain stretch of Mexican highway, Jon Kyl is known as El Autoestopisto Blanco Borracho.

Jon Kyl destroyed love in 1973. All feelings since then have been but a shadow of the original concept.

Jon Kyl can, and will, deny that you're a jolly good fellow.

Jon Kyl was sent from the future to kill Sarah Conner.

Jon Kyl is an accomplished nude hula dancer. He is not welcome in Hawaii.

Jon Kyl sponsored S.410, which would ban happiness.

Once a year, Jon Kyl retreats to the Arizona Desert and deposits 2 million egg sacs under the sand.

Jon Kyl = ax2 + bx + c

Carly Simon wrote that song about Jon Kyl.

Jon Kyl has a $1000-a-day Lik-M-Aid habit.

Jon Kyl assassinated Archduke Ferdinand.

Jon Kyl was the CEO of Enron when they took all those people's pension money.

And now I know what to say the next time I make a mistake or misspeak at work..."that wasn't intended to be a factual statement."